May 2013
reidalvein:
When you’re nice to anyone from the opposite gender for the sake of being nice and they immediately assume you’re trying to bang and you just
royal-high:
a kid from my school just got expelled today for pretending to be russian for 8 months. he pretended he couldn’t read, write or talk english he did good in all his classes because he had all the teachers and principles convinced he just moved from russia, so they didn’t make him do any work
shotawars:
shotawars:
some guy just called my number thinking i was a male prostitute, and he started talking to me about how much he could pay me so i pulled up gunshot noises on my computer and started screaming and he panicked and hung up
911 jUST FFUCKING CALLLLED ME IA AMC LAUGHHING SO HARD I TOLD THEM THE SITUEATION AND I’M STULL FUCMKING LAUGHING BECUASE NO W HTE’YRE TRACING THE GUY...
elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:
ponyboyismyhomeboy:
my eldest sister had a boyfriend when she was in fifth grade, but we moved away so they obviously couldn’t see each other. well, when she was in college her friend introduced her to some guy and it was her old boyfriend from fifth grade. after two days of catching up she told him she wanted to marry him. they’ve been married for ten years...
averypottersenioryear:
if drake and josh has taught me one thing, it’s that orange rhymes with doorhinge
sodamnrelatable:
omg my mom just came into my room and told me that I’m spending too much time on the internet so she told me “I’m sorry I have to do this but its for your own good…” and then she proceeded to delete the internet explorer icon from my desktop I’m laughing so hard I’m gonna pee myself omfg
I like being alone, but I hate the feeling of being lonely.
When you’re alone, you have time for yourself. Your thoughts finally catch up to you. You set your mind on things and everything is just clearer. Nothing’s bothering you and everything just feels right for once.
When you feel lonely, you feel as if no one’s there for you. It feels like no one understands you or is willing to listen....
